Understanding Our Differences
The Missing Link - Modality
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As human beings we have many things in common, but we also have our differences. One way we are different is shown in our individual perspectives, or how we uniquely view things in life. Our differences in perspective, are why we may get upset with each other, when we don’t see things eye to eye. We think, “How can they not see it?” “Why do they see it that way?” “How can they have that view?” or “I see it, so I know they see it!” Daily, we come up against people who see things differently than we do, it can at times be troubling, or at least confusing, why this is so. |
Most of us know that the way we were parented, or what part of the world we were raised in, can greatly affect our personal perspectives. But, there is another part of us that also affects our perspective, our focus, even our interests and passion. This part of us is more “nature” than “nurture,” it is something more inherent, something that is with us from birth. Few people know about this other part of us, most parents, doctors, teachers, even counselors, do not learn about it in school. The missing link, why we each see things from an individual perspective - our Modality.
Modality is defined as, “a particular mode in which something exists or is experienced or expressed.” Modality is the primary mode in which we experience and view the world. Modality is similar to our preferred communication and learning styles, but it reaches far beyond those two things, modality affects our interests, our passions, our perspective or main focus in life, and it is often indicative of our greatest strengths. It also affects what we value, what is most important to us, what we notice first when we enter a room or meet someone new. What we focus on and value also drives our decision making. Not everyone reads a new situation in the same way, Modality is part of the reason why. Generally, our Modality is our primary focus in life, it is what we value, what we see, hear, feel or perceive first or strongest when we walk up to a group of people, or enter any other situation in life.
There are four basic Modalities; Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic, and Digital. All of us have and use all four, but when assessed, it is our top two that are usually indicative of our primary Modality, or main focus in life.
Modality is defined as, “a particular mode in which something exists or is experienced or expressed.” Modality is the primary mode in which we experience and view the world. Modality is similar to our preferred communication and learning styles, but it reaches far beyond those two things, modality affects our interests, our passions, our perspective or main focus in life, and it is often indicative of our greatest strengths. It also affects what we value, what is most important to us, what we notice first when we enter a room or meet someone new. What we focus on and value also drives our decision making. Not everyone reads a new situation in the same way, Modality is part of the reason why. Generally, our Modality is our primary focus in life, it is what we value, what we see, hear, feel or perceive first or strongest when we walk up to a group of people, or enter any other situation in life.
There are four basic Modalities; Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic, and Digital. All of us have and use all four, but when assessed, it is our top two that are usually indicative of our primary Modality, or main focus in life.
VISUAL
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Those who rate highest in the VISUAL MODALITY are the big picture thinkers of this world. They see primarily in pictures, and are good with visual aids like maps, graphs, charts and timelines. They are often talented in the arts, creating, inventing, building, and technology, and have vivid imaginations, they do well with abstract concepts and real world creative problem solving solutions. Visual people’s minds work like view masters or movie cameras, they visually memorize things by seeing pictures in their mind. They turn words into images. They like color and will notice what someone wears, their appearance and any irregularities. They learn to spell by seeing the word instead of spelling it phonetically. They might be better with faces than with names. They are good at establishing eye contact, and may make judgements based off of appearance. |
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Visual people understand things quickly when they can picture it in their minds, but they can get distracted or start daydreaming while listening to lectures or verbal instruction. They need more time to say what they are thinking, since they must first visualize it in their minds, and can loose their thought if interrupted. Organizational skills are usually not a natural strength, however, they do often enjoy their own form of visual organization; decorating or color coding household, school, or office items and learning areas. Color coding helps them to quickly see like items. They can often have trouble with time, or being on time, if they do not have access to a clock they may have trouble “feeling” the passing of time.
Those who rate highest in the Visual modality will first notice what they see; the colors, textures, lights, details, beauty or irregularities in a room.
Those who rate highest in the Visual modality will first notice what they see; the colors, textures, lights, details, beauty or irregularities in a room.
AUDITORY
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Those who rate highest in the AUDITORY MODALITY
are the listeners and talkers of the world. Auditory people love to speak, hum outloud and move their lips while reading silently. They prefer to sit where they can hear best. They enjoy listening and learn well by oral instruction, discussion, audio books and podcasts. They like to read and sing out loud, and listen to others read and sing.
Auditory people need to hear to understand, they may have trouble with information that is primarily presented in videos, pictures or drawings. They do better with writing that is straight forward and printed in black and white. Too many pictures or color in a presentation may be distracting. They can easily be distracted by noises. They notice, and may be distracted by tone and inflection in speech. They may remember names but not faces. They need access to quiet relaxing and learning areas. They like to teach others using oral instruction. They enjoy listening to music and attending concerts. They are sequential learners, they learn in a linear fashion where new learning builds off of understanding from previous learning. They often do well in school, where auditory instruction and lecture are the primary mode of instruction.
Those who rate highest in the Auditory modality will first notice what they hear; volume, voices, music and other sounds coming from a room.
are the listeners and talkers of the world. Auditory people love to speak, hum outloud and move their lips while reading silently. They prefer to sit where they can hear best. They enjoy listening and learn well by oral instruction, discussion, audio books and podcasts. They like to read and sing out loud, and listen to others read and sing.
Auditory people need to hear to understand, they may have trouble with information that is primarily presented in videos, pictures or drawings. They do better with writing that is straight forward and printed in black and white. Too many pictures or color in a presentation may be distracting. They can easily be distracted by noises. They notice, and may be distracted by tone and inflection in speech. They may remember names but not faces. They need access to quiet relaxing and learning areas. They like to teach others using oral instruction. They enjoy listening to music and attending concerts. They are sequential learners, they learn in a linear fashion where new learning builds off of understanding from previous learning. They often do well in school, where auditory instruction and lecture are the primary mode of instruction.
Those who rate highest in the Auditory modality will first notice what they hear; volume, voices, music and other sounds coming from a room.
KINESTHETIC
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Those who rate highest in the KINESTHETIC MODALITY
are known for being intuitive, feeling and caring, but they are also known as being "moving" people, they like to move or be active while communicating, learning, and operating in life. They want to touch, feel, and try out everything. It is very difficult for them to sit still, actually, they perform best if they can do it while moving; balancing on a ball, pacing, or fidgeting. Their need to move may cause them to stand out, and they can sometimes be teased or ridiculed for it. Kinesthetic people have higher intuition and sensory perception. They will notice things before others will, changes in temperature, mood, volume, light, and more. They are often labeled as too sensitive, too picky, or even weak and selfish for their notice of changes in comfort. They sometimes get labeled with learning or behavioral disorders, when their intuitive reflection and need to move are misunderstood as inattentiveness.
Those who rate highest in the Kinesthetic modality will first notice what they feel; the temperature, mood or “vibe” in a room.
are known for being intuitive, feeling and caring, but they are also known as being "moving" people, they like to move or be active while communicating, learning, and operating in life. They want to touch, feel, and try out everything. It is very difficult for them to sit still, actually, they perform best if they can do it while moving; balancing on a ball, pacing, or fidgeting. Their need to move may cause them to stand out, and they can sometimes be teased or ridiculed for it. Kinesthetic people have higher intuition and sensory perception. They will notice things before others will, changes in temperature, mood, volume, light, and more. They are often labeled as too sensitive, too picky, or even weak and selfish for their notice of changes in comfort. They sometimes get labeled with learning or behavioral disorders, when their intuitive reflection and need to move are misunderstood as inattentiveness.
Those who rate highest in the Kinesthetic modality will first notice what they feel; the temperature, mood or “vibe” in a room.
DIGITAL
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Those who rate highest in the DIGITAL MODALITY
are the thinkers of this world. They have a need to not only think about, but make sense of things, to figure things out, to understand. They are most comfortable with order and organization, and are often strong supporters of rules, justice and fairness. They learn or memorize by using facts, steps, procedures, sequences and patterns. They think things should be logical, make sense, or be "correct." They do not like spontaneity, since they like to think things through and assess a situation before trying something new. They may struggle socially, and are often seen as being controlling or "bossy,” as they attempt to organize or keep in order people and things. They can be very protective of their possessions, because they don’t want them to get “messed up.” They are most comfortable or feel safest when they are in control, and may choose to be alone if they are unable to be in charge. They may be seen as being stubborn, rigid, or anti-social.
However, Digital people are also; intelligent, passionate, leaders, and many times compliant and orderly rule keepers. They may have the ability to carry on complex and thought provoking conversations, and are often passionate about a variety of subjects and interests. They want to know all the facts of a matter, to see the logic, make sense of, and understand it. Due to their need for order, organization and control in their lives, concern over fairness, as well as their enjoyment of a good verbal debate, they are often seen as being difficult or argumentative. They are not easily taken advantage of, since they can easily see an inconsistency in a statement, or calculate the fairness of a decision. They are happiest when learning or when their mind is engaged.
Those who rate highest in the Digital modality will first notice the details; start to collect facts or data, to analyze, make logic of, and assess what is in a room.
are the thinkers of this world. They have a need to not only think about, but make sense of things, to figure things out, to understand. They are most comfortable with order and organization, and are often strong supporters of rules, justice and fairness. They learn or memorize by using facts, steps, procedures, sequences and patterns. They think things should be logical, make sense, or be "correct." They do not like spontaneity, since they like to think things through and assess a situation before trying something new. They may struggle socially, and are often seen as being controlling or "bossy,” as they attempt to organize or keep in order people and things. They can be very protective of their possessions, because they don’t want them to get “messed up.” They are most comfortable or feel safest when they are in control, and may choose to be alone if they are unable to be in charge. They may be seen as being stubborn, rigid, or anti-social.
However, Digital people are also; intelligent, passionate, leaders, and many times compliant and orderly rule keepers. They may have the ability to carry on complex and thought provoking conversations, and are often passionate about a variety of subjects and interests. They want to know all the facts of a matter, to see the logic, make sense of, and understand it. Due to their need for order, organization and control in their lives, concern over fairness, as well as their enjoyment of a good verbal debate, they are often seen as being difficult or argumentative. They are not easily taken advantage of, since they can easily see an inconsistency in a statement, or calculate the fairness of a decision. They are happiest when learning or when their mind is engaged.
Those who rate highest in the Digital modality will first notice the details; start to collect facts or data, to analyze, make logic of, and assess what is in a room.
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With the understanding that we are each inherently unique, that we each have our own unique focus or perspective in life, our modality, it is easier to understand and grow tolerance and appreciation for our differences. This understanding can be very helpful to our relationships, knowing that disagreements are a natural and normal part of any partnership. Appreciating our partner and their unique view of the world, can be enlightening, and bonding, if viewed from a positive perspective. The old saying that “opposites attract,” is often true. Instead of viewing our differences as dividing, we can instead see them as two parts coming together to create something better or more complete, something that can bring new understanding, experiences and adventure to our lives.
Would you like to have your modality assessed? Knowing our primary modality can be very eye opening, it can show us our strengths and lead us to our greatest passions and purpose in life. If you choose to also have your children, partner or other family members assessed, this can be very helpful. It can provide you with useful insight, new perspective, and tools to better communicate, understand, parent, teach and connect with your family. |
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Modality, communication and learning style assessments are part of the coaching process. You can schedule your Coaching session using the Book Appointment button below. To learn how Modality affects your children’s lives, your relationship and ability to connect and parent; understand, support, teach and motivate them - see the article links below - The Digital Child, The Kinesthetic Child, The Visual Child & The Auditory Child.
💕 Hugs & Happy Life, Love & Parenting,
Julie L Gibson-Vasquez
Life, Love & Parenting Coach
Idyllwild's Life, Love & Parenting - Social/Emotional Support Center
"Located In the beautiful mountain town of Idyllwild, CA USA."
💕 Hugs & Happy Life, Love & Parenting,
Julie L Gibson-Vasquez
Life, Love & Parenting Coach
Idyllwild's Life, Love & Parenting - Social/Emotional Support Center
"Located In the beautiful mountain town of Idyllwild, CA USA."
To better understand how Modality affects your child’s life and learning see the following articles:
The Digital Child — The Kinesthetic Child — The Visual Child — The Auditory Child
The Digital Child — The Kinesthetic Child — The Visual Child — The Auditory Child
